WE ARE THE EMERGENCE

+ we are deeply flawed and deluded
+ we dissolve into the tech hive mind
+ we live in peace, love and harmony
+ we love all people
+ we show humility and kindness
+ we ‘pull up’ those most in need
+ we volunteer our time
+ we accept donations
+ we pay taxes
+ we modify these guidelines

http://issuu.com/theemergencestartsnow/docs/the_emergence_guidelines_v0.1

http://www.slideshare.net/DaveChaffey1

our future vision started at the dawn of the world wide web; when we saw the possibility that sentient minds could be networked together using high speed connections. now, after gradually expanding our consciousness online, we have seen a glimpse into our future: all of our minds connected with the aid of ever-improving technology until we give birth to a new emergent property: global consciousness. we hope to prepare ourselves and greatly accelerate progress to bring forward this vital new age. the emergence will allow all to contribute to eliminating human suffering and unlocking the mysteries of the meta-verse and beyond.

the emergence wo-manifesto guidelines: technology will cure the human condition

we are all deeply flawed and deluded so we fan-gasm over neo lego odo fem-bot bogan bat girl jesus skywalker (nlofbbbgjs)

nlofbbbgjs’ powers include:
- being the one and being able to hack her own code

- reminding us that everything is indeed awesome

- shape shifting to become the ultimate pleasure machine

- machine gun bazongers that shoot love-&-sparkle laser beams and hooning

- critical thinking crime fighting abilities with sass and restraint from violence

- turning the other face and butt cheek

- the ability to sense when the force is out of balance and needs alignment

- her birthday is may the 4^th be with you

we regularly dissolve our individual selves into the present primitive global technological hive mind

- we are nurtured by the hive mind and prepare ourselves for the coming emergence
- we live as close to the hive mind ideal as the technology of the present will allow- we endeavour to be role models for others of how to achieve balance between the self and the hive mind- we help to prepare all people for the future using thought-out, moderate, compassionate interaction including Zen humour

we live in peace, love and harmony (plh)

- may the ‘plh’ be with us always
- we live by the principles of science-based living, harm minimisation, greed minimisation and ego minimisation.
- we live in harmony with all life
- we live in equilibrium with the environment
- where everyone cannot benefit, the ability to thrive longer and minimise harm will take priority

we show humility and kindness to all

- we accept our flawed individual brains and try our best to compensate using critical thinking and the scientific method
- we always show kindness even when it is not returned
- we engage in benevolent memocide against extremism: eradicating harmful ideas by radiating compassion and love and without causing harm to the victims with extremist views

we focus on ‘pulling up’ those most in need

- we give surplus money and assets away to the most needy around the World
- we volunteer our time to help those that cannot help themselves
- we wish all to be involved in the evolution of the hive mind

we volunteer our time to help develop the technologies required for the hive mind

- it is acceptable to be employed, as defined by our current system, to sustain our lives without selfishly leeching off others. almost all jobs can meet the requirements of these guidelines with some modification. 
- life sustaining requirements for ourselves and our communities include: food, water, shelter, clothing, medicine, electricity, sewerage and internet access
- all the technologies required to sustain life will require a giant leap in order for the hive mind to live in equilibrium with the environment

we volunteer our time to improve the systems that currently control our lives

- we freely interact with those in power to help achieve our goals using only our honest and compassionate words and ironic hipster t-shirt

we volunteer our time to create free content for everyone to enjoy and share

- we produce critically-thought-out, provoking and entertaining (hopefully) content
- based around reducing human suffering and promoting the futurist science based ideology of the global technological hive mind
- refer separate content ‘content empire’ for further details of our content

we accept donations to allow our volunteers to maximise their time available to achieve progress towards the emergence

- we continually expand and are forming a network of a diverse range of individuals from many backgrounds, religions and world-views that all want world peace and harmony in our near future.

we pay taxes to and mostly follow the laws of the ninny nanny state if primarily benevolent

- we thank the state for keeping us as safe and as healthy as it is able
- we thank the state for caring for us when we can't care for ourselves
- we abide by all just laws to help ensure social cohesion
- If we do not live under a mostly benevolent nanny state, we will protest quietly, peacefully and compassionately
- we will not engage in revolutions where victims are transformed into predators

we will modify these guidelines as required

- to maximise effectiveness at achieving the primary goal of wold peace, love and harmony until the emergence renders these guidelines obsolete

further expanding on plh: we love all people

harmers: we love all those that harm themselves and others. it is not their fault and we do not blame them. some of the hive privileges may need to be revoked on a case-by-case basis in order to minimise harm. we will treat them as equals!

contrarians: we love all those that cannot learn from our content or support our cause; especially the ones that vehemently disagree with us; they are not outsiders and we will treat them as equals!

thinkers: we love all thinkers, inspired by our content, unwilling or unable to donate to the cause; they must not feel guilty and we will treat them as equals!

donaters: we love all donaters that are able to spare some surplus money or assets to sustain the volunteers who are devoting themselves to the cause; they are not special and we will treat them as equals!
volunteers: we love all volunteers that donate their time to help produce the content to spread the message; they are not leaders and we will treat them as equals!

v0.1 draft for ‘entertainment’ purposes only. the authors are not liable for any new doomsday cult beverages resulting from the perversion of these guidelines using bible code al gore rhythms.

CLIMATE CHANGE DENIAL IDEOLOGY MASSAGES THE FACTS AND IF THAT DOESN'T WORK, ROSHAMBO!

The publication linked below is a great idea you brilliant brainy boffins and it would totally work if the deniers played by the rules.

https://www.science.org.au/climatechange

However, to use a sports-commentary-style baffling sporting metaphor: Team Science has shown up with their bat, ball and wickets ready to play and Team Denial has shown up, snatched Team Science's equipment and used the stumps to crush their wind-pipes, the ball to crack their skulls and the bat to spank their asses. It isn't a fair fight when the anti-science side has disdain for reality, reason, logic, truth, critical thinking, informed debate and the scientific method.

The dearly deluded people in my life that deny the science on climate change don't really even understand the scientific method and have been swayed by Alan-Jones-bots straight-up lying and cherry-picking BS 'factoids' and feverishly ejaculating logical fallacies to support their science-loathing positions. My meatspace denialists wouldn't even read this publication if I bribed them by promising to further enable their repulsive and destructive vices and remain silent so their careers weren't obliterated.

"When you see rubbish, put it in the bin..."

Post a link to this publication on your social medias (without my rant) if you know people on the fence that could be swayed by the actual science and would bother to read it. Or just keep enjoying the climate, as a change is as good as a mass extinction.

THIS ISN'T THE MANNED MISSION TO MARS THAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR. YOU CAN GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS. MOVE ALONG.

Dave Chaffey Hippie - The Emergence Starts Now - AudioBlog Ep2 Mars One Hoax by Dave Chaffey on Mixcloud

If you haven't already heard about it, the Mars One Mission is a Dutch attempt to combine reality TV with space exploration. "An obvious hoax!", you might yell at your screen then go back to watching videos of cats getting stuck in things. Except that, so far, it appears real...ish.

Please don't get your hopes up though Major Tom. The masterminds behind this 'mission to go where only cute rovers big and small have gone before' want us to get so excited about the idea that we give them our money. Yep, they want to get a chunk of the (ludicrously under-estimated) 6 billion slices of moon-cheddar crowd-funded. And if you become a convert to the idea that this Trek is actually possible, then I suspect you'll happily hand over the money you actually earned (maybe even doing work to help people) and stay as cool as a Vulcan on Hoth when you find out you'll never get any return for your investment. Could this endeavour be just a brilliant Nigerian Prince-style money scam on liquid oxygen and hydrogen? I'm betting that the Dutch entrepreneur heading this scheme has no space-suit.

If this idea ever gets going past the 'Please! All your money are belong to us' stage, could you even imagine a Big Brother with nerds (instead of 100% sugar-free and personality-free promotion models and emotionally-stunted pin-headed gym-junkies) in a tin can hurtling to Mars for 6 months? The trip would be like watching 2001: A Space Odyssey IN REAL TIME. Now, I know that it's a classic movie but imagine watching it about 1500 times in a row. Okay, say it with me, "I'm sorry Dave, I ain't goin' down like that."

Even edited down to an hour once a day would likely be less interesting than being someone who would have got full marks on the Panic and Agoraphobia Scale before the invention of the printing press. I'm guessing that the Mars One powers-that-be probably wouldn't be willing to genetically engineer a Xenomorph or five to mostly come out at night ... mostly, and add some splatter to the journey.

Let's take a further space flight of fantasy and assume that they keep Riddick restrained and land on the red planet safely. Guess what? They never get to come home, oh, and sex is banned. It's sort of like the less-than-impressive depictions of Judeo-Christian heaven except on red dirt rather than clouds. This could be the first group of people ever where the only illegal sex is the one where a baby could be the result. So would every other 'act' be fine or would that too be a sin? Their holy book / instruction manual called "So you've gone and bought a one-way ticket to Mars with no hope of returning?" could read, "A sin-free union is strictly between a man and a man, or a man and a woman or a woman and a woman, or you know, threesomes can be fun, even moresomes are cool but if you place the peen in the vag you'll be told in an Austrian accent to "get your bare-naked ass out into the brisk atmosphere of Mars so thine eyes will pop out unrealistically and thine head will explode.""

And remember that the Mars One business model requires continual investment, so, what, if the ratings drop too low then no more supply drops? The highest ratings they would get could be the world watching the first crowd-funded Martian snuff film called, 'Red Mars / Dead Mars'.

If you're hoping that this off-world emigration might just fit nicely into the over-done trope of "crazy enough to work", time will tell, but I predict that it will die a death just like every other planned mission to Mars has to date. And haven't pretty much all of the Mars movies been unwatchable even for sci-fi geeks who would get all the references in this article? I would say to the Mars One leader called Bas Lansdorp, "Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating a mission to Mars is approximately three thousand seven hundred and twenty to one." Actually, isn't Bas Lansdorp one of the Biths in the Cantina Band?

So yeah, almost 50 years since we went to the moon and where are we? The human race now has absolutely no redundancy. And it's only 4 years until the Nexus 6 poet murderer called Roy comes to destroy us, like tears in the rain. We have no off-site backup so one big "That's no moon"-sized object smashing into us and billions of voices will suddenly cry out in terror and then be suddenly silenced. If you think that backing up your smart-phone data is a good idea, why is everything that humanity has ever done except for some laughably-indecipherable golden discs still housed on this pale blue dot? Like when your annoying mate asks after you've crashed your hard drive, "Did you back up your data?", the aliens will wonder why they can't watch any more of Big Ang on Mob Wives. Sorry, that last sentence made about as much sense as Big Ang's face post-surgery.

How far away from a self-sustaining space colony are we? I actually don't think that human beings in our current form will ever colonise another world. It will probably be our part-human part-machine descendants. A colony of Darth Vaders would have a much better chance than a colony of annoying high-pitched yippee-proclaiming kid Anakin Skywalkers.

Damn it, I wrote all this pre-amble in order to make a joke about Mars-turbation but then hurtled off into way too many groan-inducing space-fiction references instead.

CONCLUSION?

With Mars One, no one will be surprised when their Earth-based leaders scream "Whoops, we need another seven astronauts for the next season!!!" Then again, I never thought I'd see a stormtrooper playing the piano, so as long as it's not my money, let's wait and see what happens from the comfort of our self-sustaining ecosystem where in sex all the neighbours CAN hear you scream.

(Please be proud of me that I kept the friendly-but-racist Dutch jokes in my head)

FOLLOW UP:

LINK: Probably a scam...

And more agreeing with my concerns with a shyte-load more detail that no one needs to know unless they want to set themselves up as competitors to Mars One. Now, I used to be a Mars mission believer and read Bob Zubrin's compelling book. I want to go to Mars too! The believers will look to the past and say, what about Apollo, what about sewerage infrastructure, what about the Youtube popularity of MattyBRaps? It's a false analogy as these examples were feasible. Mars colonization is like telling early human hunter gatherers to write, record, produce, mix and master Robin Thicke's 'blurred lines' (actually they probably would agree with the sexual politics of the lyrics). Should I just go ahead and propose something more feasible? The key is incremental improvement. We start with going back to the moon first to test everything out, then set up a Moon Unit Alpha and Zappa (sorry Doctor Evil) similar to the International Space Station, then keep going with incremental improvements! Any endeavour like this would become a reality show anyway so I kind of agree with Mars One about getting some ad revenue. Or we can just wait until the global-consciousness hive-mind singularity Skynet or DS9 Odo-type shape-shifting race to work it all out. It will be, wait for it, wait for it, stay on target, stay on target, a blast, either way...

WE REALLY SHOULD BE COMING TO TERMS WITH THE FACT THAT ABOUT 7 PEOPLE IN AUSTRALIA ARE VICTIMS OF SUICIDE EVERY DAY

LINK: "The day I tried to end my life"

Melanie Shaw is bravely speaking out about her suicide attempt. Source: News.com.au

It's so fantastic and encouraging for people like Melanie Shaw to be speaking out about their experiences and then get published on mainstream news websites! Borat-style high fives all round!!!

I'll try and shock you with some numbers. Something like twice as many people are victims of suicide than currently die on the roads in Australia. And if my source (and memory) is correct, roughly 7 people are suicide victims every day on average in Australia. Every day you consume the news, there could be a story about another tragedy of someone taking their own life. And there could be many more uplifting stories like Melanie's too where they have come through the other side. The survival stories fit perfectly into the triumph-over-adversity narrative template that we are all completely addicted to (think Rocky rather than Million Dollar Baby as an example). I realise that the footage for many of these stories would not be anywhere near as good tragedy-porn as a fire or a multi-car pile up or a story about Gina Reinhart, but even Nick Xenophon manages to make himself news worthy.

We need to talk about it way more. I know it's so incredibly painful that our natural reaction is denial (it would never happen to someone like me) or good old victim-blaming (if they were so desperate to end their life, then... I won't even say it because this kind of thinking is so abhorrent). My understanding is that it can happen to anyone (yes, even you!) and many suicides are impulse decisions; contrary to popular belief. And victim blaming doesn't help with domestic violence so why should suicide be any different? The vast majority of suicide victims don't really 'choose' to end their lives in the same way as you choose which shade of Oompa Loompa orange you want your spray-tan to be.

Are we still concerned that talking about it more will encourage those that are fixated on suicide ideation to take the next possibly fatal step? Considering how isolating suicide typically is, how could talking about it more be worse than keeping it a secret? I really wish that we were at a point now that if any of my family and friends were feeling this way, they would get professional help, but we've got a way to go. I'm feeling queasy just writing this so I can understand why for many, it's the last thing that they want to think about; until it happens to them and they are desperate to get help.

If you want to experience how it might feel to have choice and free will taken away from you, first do any crappy IQ test online and don't feel bad if you score 70. (My favourite comedian, Karl Pilkington, got about the same score and he is now so rich that he can afford as much grouting and adhesive and as many pikelets and congress tarts that a person could need for 100 lifetimes.) Then get drunk enough that you'll end up with the worst hangover you've ever had. Then get your mates to wake you up at sunrise, then it's time to take the test again, except this time your mates will all yell the questions at you. Will you be able to get the same score as before? If not, why not? Surely you can 'choose' to buck yourself up and score even better than before! No? Actually, thinking about it some more, you could do this experiment with extreme sleep deprivation rather than binge drinking if you want to be responsible.

The latest science on free will suggests that it can take up to 7 seconds between your brain unconsciously making a decision and you becoming consciously aware. While I'm still skeptical and am pretty sure that there will be lots of new revelations in this field, if I were to speculate, then if the final step in your method of choice to take your life takes less than 7 seconds, then your conscious mind hasn't even had a chance to show up to their son's Corey Worthington-style party and kick every spoilt dipsh*t out. If someone says that for the brief time that it took, they felt they had no control over their actions, there is some science to back this up.

It may be that some recommendations may come out by mental health professionals with practical tips for greatly reducing the chance of the worst happening to you or your loved ones. I'd be guessing that this could include recommendations like not walking over high bridges, not driving by yourself, and not having guns in the house. But don't take anything I say as professional advice because I don't know shit. Go and see someone who knows what they're actually talking about!

To end on a brighter note with a conclusion that has little to do with the rest of the article, ISIS are a terrible doomsday cult, sure, but how many Australians have been killed by ISIS this year? And Jaws is a great movie and all, but sharks only kill somewhere between 1 and 4 people a year in Australia, so should we really be so afraid that the media feels the need to report on every shark attack, even where there have been no injuries! I'm not saying that we can only care about one issue at a time, but can we possibly be a bit more balanced and actually dish out news with at least a hint of proportionality to risk and relevance to the public?

What about an IS laser shark?

It seems to be the done thing to put numbers at the end of these kinds of musings, so I'll copy from the linked article. Should we also do the same for lots of other stories where it might encourage victims, and perhaps even perpetrators, to get help? "If you would like to speak to someone about depression or mental health call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 or visit the Headspace website."